Celibacy/Procreation

Hello John,

Trust you are doing fine. Coming to your query,

Q: What should be a Brahmachari's approach as regards to the act of copulation for fathering children?
A: As stated in earlier posts, the purpose of the sexual act is procreation and not recreation. The sexual act indulged in with one's legally wedded wife takes a divine and holy dimension if carried out with the sole purpose of begetting a child. God has created the act of sex for the very purpose of producing offspring and the use of this act for this divine and rightful purpose within the institution of matrimony does not amount to unrighteousness. Ensuring that a family, society and community of people continue to have their presence on earth and pass on their knowledge to future generations can be achieved by no other means but by producing healthy, talented, morally and emotionally sound offspring and we all know that the sexual act is the rightful means to this objective. Hence limiting sexual activity to procreation does not cause any debility or decay in the Brahmachari.

Keeping this eternal truth in mind, a Brahmachari is allowed to indulge in the sexual act with his legally wedded wife, 'Once' per wanted child till conception occurs. Further to an honest and sincere life of Brahmacharya, the sperm concentration and virility of the Brahmachari is generally potent enough to ensure that the wife conceives with a single act of copulation if carried out during her monthly fertile period provided God wills for the couple to beget a child. Unlike the common, semen wasting man who may require days and months of efforts to make his wife conceive, the Brahmachari has a very high chance of ensuring successful conception with a single act of intercourse. The sperm motility and density in his semen are in abundance and super-charged with ample 'Prana'(life energy) further to his long conservation and transmutation of the seminal fluid. This enables him to very easily 'create' another life under God's will.

A non-celibate man leading a life of wastage expends many 'liters' of semen by way of 'thousands' of 'wasteful' ejaculations he indulges in further to a life of recreational sex and masturbation in his lifetime. The Brahmachari on the other hand conserves all this energy and spends only a 'spoon' or two of semen per wanted child! Anyone can compare the two cases and know by commonsense the immense benefits and merits the celibate accrues as compared to the non-celibate. If expenditure of the vital seed is limited only to the act of fathering an offspring or two, the Brahmachari practically loses no energy, vitality or other benefits derived from Brahmacharya in the sense of totality. It is like taking out a glass of water from a lake...Does the lake get depleted and become shallow further to removal of a glass of water? NO.

Though outside the purview of this question, For the benefit of celibates who plan to marry or married celibates who wish to beget progeny, I will now also put forward the conditions and rules that a Brahmachari and his wife can follow if he wishes for a happy and virtuous married life, offspring, and yet derive the full benefits of Brahmacharya by being undeviated from the concept of true Brahmacharya:

1. The final purpose of marriage is evolution and companionship. Further to taking the vows of marriage with the blessings of elders, well wishers and society, the man and wife should stay by each other through the joys and sorrows, the ups and downs of life based on the foundations of true love, loyalty, fidelity, trust, understanding, companionship and genuine care and concern for each other as 'souls'- The manifestations of God and not as 'bodies' made of flesh and bone. This approach and perspective towards one's spouse ensures that the couple are not overpowered by lust, passion and delusion as regards to each other and always 'view' each other as 'pure souls' brought together by divine will to help each other evolve and attain self-realization. Such an approach automatically ensures that Brahmacharya in married life becomes 'effortless and natural' and that the love, bonding and genuine feelings of care and concern become very strong and concrete at the innate level. Such couples receive divine blessings and do not desert or cheat the other for impermanent sense pleasures such money, name, position or fame. Their relationship develops on the rock solid foundation called 'true love' which is beyond the body, looks, social & financial status, which are all external and impermanent factors of life. True love has nothing to do with these external factors. True love is that permanent and indissoluble feeling that springs from recognition and gratitude towards the other person as a 'manifestation of god' and as a 'soul' who has come to enrich and ease our life. With such a perspective, the man and woman should lead a life of virtuous Brahmacharya with adequate God meditation/prayer and governed by the tenets of kindness, truthfulness, non-violence and non-possessiveness for other's wealth and property. Constant efforts and perseverance in this direction will being enormous happiness and contentment in the marriage and make the joint life of celibacy the gateway to sheer bliss.

2. At the earliest point of time after marriage, the couple should make the effort to beget a child. It is to be remembered that the purpose of marriage is progeny, companionship and evolution in that order. Delay in begetting a child can lead to the couple getting caught with lust, passion and finally discontentment and suffering. Hence begetting a child should be the first priority after marriage.

3. The man and woman should ascertain the monthly 'fertile period' of the wife (the time when she is most likely to conceive) and engage in the reproductive act. Before commencement of the act, the man and woman should meditate whole heartedly for a few minutes on God with complete devotion and surrender and request - " O Lord, The great creator, Me and my beloved wife will henceforth engage in the divine act of reproduction for begetting progeny. Kindly bless us with a virtuous and divine 'soul' in the form of a child who is endowed with spirituality, health, intelligence and wisdom. Salutations to thee".

4. On successful completion of the act, the man should leave home so he and his wife stay away from each other for a period of two days. Further to the break in Brahmacharya, the emotional states of the man and wife would be volatile, vulnerable and sexually unstable due to expenditure of their vital fluids and indulgence in the act which consumes much 'Prana' or life force. In order to ensure that no more unwanted sexual interactions occur, the man is advised to leave the place for two days to let his own and his wife's emotional states stabilize and come back to normal.

5. Upon completion of the two days of separation, the man and lady revert to their combined life of celibacy and carry on as before.

Further to such an honest, virtuous and divine life of combined celibacy where the man and woman conserve and transmute their vital essences and cohabit with each other only for wanted offspring, It is said that a 'great' soul comes down their family way as a child. Children born out of such a holy union between a man and wife in a combined life of celibacy will most often be exceptionally talented, healthy, virtuous and noble with an abundance of lofty qualities.

The benefits of God-bliss, health, prosperity, true love, genuine understanding, concern, care and absolute loyalty that a couple derive further to a combined mode of celibacy in marriage with constant God-meditation and prayer are the results which I have personally experienced in the joint mode of a combined life of celibacy that I am leading with my wife. This is based on my personal experience and is beyond doubt.

To sum up, a virtuous life of Brahmacharya before marriage and continuance of such a life after marriage with a 'pause' while trying for offspring does not in any way weaken, debilitate or reverse the benefits one has gained from celibacy. Further to getting done with fathering a child, the aspirant and his wife can continue with their life of Brahmacharya with complete focus and devotion and aim for a 'lifetime of Brahmacharya' that leads to realization of one's own self and completes the purpose of the human existence.

God bless and have a nice day :-)
Dhananjay