Dispassion Towards Life
Question
Greetings Dhananjay,
I am a 20 year old male. I have been practicing Brahmacharya successfully for over a year now. However lately for the past few months, I've been feeling very dispassionate and disinterested towards life in general, as if I was suffering depression. I have not been giving much focus on my college studies. I don't feel like living a normal, married life. I feel like I want to dedicate my life solely to spiritual pursuits.
Is it normal to feel this way during Brahmacharya?
Also I like the idea of having a nice wife and children. And of course I would practice Brahmacharya in marriage and have sex only for procreation. But if I have very little conscious interest in sex, should I even enter into a marriage?
Answer
1. At one point, the aspirant feels as though he is ready to give up the body and the world with extreme dispassion. A few days later, the same aspirant longs intensely for all the things he used to covet earlier. All these are oscillations of the Ego, which are to be ignored. Various states of desire and no-desire are passed through during the initial years of practice. They are of no consequence. One should turn a blind eye & focus only on uninterrupted Sadhana.
2. HE will decide if you have to enter marriage, when and with whom, as HE decides all other things. Do your duty (Sadhana to realize the self) and remain quiet, accepting whatever HE decides, as regards this dream called life.
ॐ तत् सत्
(That Supreme being is the absolute truth)